Hard hugs.
The weather forecast said that the rain would stop by 9am, so even though it was pouring (did I say pouring? It was POURING!) rain at 8:15am, I pulled the Shower Shuttle out of the garage and turned it toward the Salvation Army Shelter on 9th and D streets.
We don’t always take the Shower Shuttles out in the rain but the weather was supposed to be clearing soon on that Thursday. And we have found that most of our guests will travel in the rain for the benefit of a hot shower and underwear and socks, so if they’re gonna show up, we’re gonna show up. Unless the wind is blowing hard and we can’t keep things dry under our pop-up canopies, we’ll brave a little weather.
I drove to the location which has been under construction for the past several months. And though the access road was almost always open, even under construction, today it was blocked off.
“Of course, it was!” I muttered under my breath with a sigh.
I turned left into the facility’s driveway that was not sized for buses, and pulled into one of two spots, landing her right in front of a NO PARKING sign. Heavy sigh…it was already one of those days!
I gathered my resolve and hurried up the sidewalk, planning to ask the construction crew if I could possibly drive the bus onto the access road, while the rain pelted my face. I pulled my hood up and put my head down, and walked speedily the half block to the road entrance. Coming toward me were several members of the DownTown Streets Team, most of whom I knew, hurrying the other direction to get out of the rain.
I glanced up.
“Hey Michelle!” I called out to one of the girls I knew. She is sweet and friendly and smart and outgoing and truth be told, one of my favorite people.
Michelle met my face with water-filled eyes, but not from the rain. She took a half step toward me and grabbed me in a bear hug, holding on for dear life. And right there, with rain soaking our clothes, even though I was late to get the bus to location, Michelle and I hugged. A hug that meant I’m here for you. A hug that meant you matter. A hug that meant I will help you in your pain and I love you. A hug that lasts as long as you need it to.
A hard hug.
When she finally released her grip on me, I looked her straight in her eyes and asked her what was wrong.
She shared that she was so very worried about her boyfriend who was really struggling with his addiction. She was scared for him and things had gotten to the point where she was no longer okay with his choices. She had told him so, and he was going to rehab later that day, but she was broken, and scared and worried and very tired from the drama surrounding it all.
I smiled and hugged her and told her it was going to be okay, and that I would be praying. And she could call me anytime and I would be there for her. As I continued down the sidewalk, I marveled at God’s Divine timing and how grateful I was to be at that exact place at that exact time. If the access road had been open, or the lights had been different, or any other number of things, I wouldn’t have been. But He had designed it so that I would be there, and I felt blessed.
The construction crew was super nice and opened the road, and I retrieved my bus (with no parking ticket, thank goodness!) and drove to the site and we set up for our shower day. And no, the rain did not let up by 9am. It was more like 1pm. But yes, we showered quite a few people that day and we were glad we persevered and provided showers.
I thought of Michelle and her boyfriend often and I continued to pray for them both since that rainy Thursday. But because they stay at the shelter, they don’t need our showers any longer and so I hadn’t seen or talked with either of them until today.
We were set up at a completely different location, on the West Side of Modesto, providing showers at the Vine House, when Michelle suddenly appeared. She was suddenly there, standing right next to me wearing her bright yellow work shirt of the DownTown Streets Team.
“Well, Hi!” I exclaimed, surprised to see her and happy to see her beautiful smiling face.
“Hi you!” she said back, and then went on to tell me about how she was doing at the shelter and at work and catching me up on things.
“How is he doing?” I asked her when she didn’t volunteer it.
“He’s okay. He’s been sick but he’s figuring things out,” she told me. She shared a bit more about his struggles and then smiled resignedly.
“It’s going to be okay, you know,” I told her. “He’s a grown man and he’ll get it.
“I know,” she said. “It’s just hard, you know?”
And I pulled her close and I gave her a hard hug. Not especially long, but a hug that said yes, I did know. That I was there for her and that I loved her very much. A hug that said I care.
We began this ministry in 2016 as a way to provide showers and underwear and socks to those living in poverty and homelessness. We wanted to restore hope and dignity to those in need and offer a hand-up out of poverty. But what we soon realized was that it is so much more. It is about relationships. It is about community and friendship and yes, even growing into the closeness of family.
Sometimes this calling is hard. We are human and sometimes we get tired. Or hot or cold or hungry or even frustrated. Sometimes our patience runs a little thin with challenging individuals and sometimes we forget to listen before we speak or take a breath before we react. But that’s only sometimes. Most of the time, we have the privilege and blessing of loving others and serving and showing compassion. We offer showers, and fill the need for basic hygiene, and provide a safe, comfortable environment to find friendship and acceptance and prayers. And yes, even hard hugs too.
What Can You Do?
Pray for us and pray for the people we serve.
Support our work.
As a local non-profit (501C3), we depend on support from people just like you. Give a gift today and help us in our mission to continue restoring hope and dignity to those in need with both mobile showers and laundry … and know we will continue as long as there is a calling for us to do so.
“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.”
John 13:34
